Now faith is being sure of what we
hope for and certain of what we do not see.
Hebrews 11:1
Why adoption from China?
Mainly because we have always had a heart for the orphans in China and we just knew our daughter was there! We first learned about the orphaned girls in China during our college years and our hearts were just drawn to them! China has a long, rich history and the people are just wonderful! There are also many practical reasons for adopting from China such as the children are overall healthy, the adoption process is stable and the adoption is finalized while you are in China. These and many other reasons made adopting from China the right choice for our family. China is only one country of many that has international adoption programs. There are kids all over the world and in the US that need homes.
Why are there so many abandoned girls in China?
Chinese culture has a strong preference for a male child. There are many reasons for this preference. One reason specifically is that the Chinese culture holds that the sons in a family take care of their aging parents. A daughter, however, is expected to leave her family and care for her husband’s parents rather than her own. So sons are preferred to daughters, particularly in the countryside. China is changing and many no longer hold this belief system however, it is still prominent in the rural areas of the country.
Another reason is the One Child Policy. In an attempt to control population growth, China prohibits most families from having more than 1 child and has incentives in place for families to follow the policy. The cultural beliefs along with the one child policy, has resulted in thousands of children, the majority healthy, being abandoned each year. Many Chinese families feel like they have no choice but to abandon their baby girls in a public place so they will be found quickly and taken to an orphanage. These birthparents know their babies will be taken care of in the orphanage and hopefully adopted into families.
Why a Special Needs child?
China also has children other than babies in orphanages, including those with special needs (SN) and older children. Many of the children in the SN program in China have medically correctable conditions and what most in the US would not even consider a special need. There are also healthy children over the age of 6 available for adoption.
We chose an older child with a correctable SN for many reasons. One, we have been blessed with 2 healthy infants. Then as Walker turned a year old we became more open to an older child. We knew we wanted another child but weren’t so sure we were ready to have a 6 year old and 2 kids under the age of 2 in the home :). As we thought more about a child between Avery and Walker’s age we decided this would definitely be the right fit for our family!
We were also lucky to have 2 extended family members that had recently decided to adopt older children from China. Isaiah is a little boy, 4 years old, with a minor ear issue. We were able to meet him in the Summer of 2009 and we were amazed at how healthy he was and how well he fit into the family with his older sister. Not to mention he is adorable! Robert's sister was also adopting a 13 year old girl from China. Betty is an amazing young lady and a perfect fit for their family! Having people so close in our lives as living examples of the success of older child adoption made the possibility of an older child joining our family not only an option but in the end a reality. It is exciting to see how other peoples adoption journeys helped to shape ours!
Betty and her new family
Isaiah and sister Maris
The Waiting Child
I saw you meet your child today
You kissed your baby joyfully
And as you walked away with her
I played pretend you'd chosen me.
I'm happy for the baby, yet
Inside I'm aching miserably
I want to plead as you go by,
"Does no-one want a child of three?"
I saw you meet your child today
In love with her before you met
And as I watched you take her out
I knew it wasn't my turn yet.
I recognize you from last year!
I knew I'd seen your face before!
But you came for a second babe.
Does no-one want a child of four?
I saw you meet your child today
But this time there was something new
A nurse came in and took MY hand
And then she gave my hand to you.
Can this be true? I'm almost six!
And there are infants here you see?
But then you kissed me and I knew
The child you chose this time was me.
Copyright © 1997 by Debbie_Bodie@prodigy.com.
Reprinted with permission.